


ROSE RED

by notfoxmulder



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cancer, Car Accidents, Depression, Developing Relationship, F/M, Hospitals, Hurt Fox Mulder, Love, Multi, Self-Harm, Sick Character, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-26
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2019-12-18 08:40:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18246326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notfoxmulder/pseuds/notfoxmulder
Summary: It is now four days ago that Scully has finally defeated her cancer. She tries to be strong and to look forward, but it seems as if all this is not over yet. She tries not to reveal her weakness and begins to isolate herself.Is it really good that she does not talk to anyone about it?At least she thinks she would do the right thing. And while she doesn't try to show her weakness, she is only weakened more.Will she be able to withstand her own demons and fears, or will she collapse under the last?





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> The story was originally posted on my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction where I still update. You can also choose how the story should go on there! I'm updating the story to archive of our own. So of you're interested check out my instagram! :)

ROSE RED  
Prolog

It is now four days ago that Scully has finally defeated her cancer. She tries to be strong and to look forward, but it seems as if all this is not over yet. She tries not to reveal her weakness and begins to isolate herself.  
Is it really good that she does not talk to anyone about it?  
At least she thinks she would do the right thing. And while she doesn't try to show her weakness, she is only weakened more.  
Will she be able to withstand her own demons and fears, or will she collapse under the last?

Chapter one

She just sat there, on her sofa, thinking. She shrieked as her phone rang, but she did not move. She just sat there, without the phone only to consider. Her eyes fixed on the wall. The phone rang on and on. After the eight time, she turned her look to the phone and played with the thought to take the call. She took the phone and looked at it a long time.  
On the Display a name ~Mulder.  
She looked at it further, was not sure whether she should take the call or not. The name was echoed in her head, again and again. She was amazed how long it was ringing, when finally her answering machine announced.  
\-- Here is the answering machine of Dana Scully. Please leave a message after the signal ton--  
"scully, i..."  
She heared his insecure voice.  
"i just wanted to ask you how you're doing. You're not answering your Calls. I'm worried about you."  
He sighted.  
"please call me back"  
She had to admit that his voice really sounded worried, but she could not use compassion. She did not even make a Impression and when she heard the click in the line she knew he had hung up.  
It is now four days ago, four days after she had won against the cancer. She had not been the same since. It had changed her, whether this was good or bad she hadn't decided yet.  
To be exact she had isolated herself completely from the outside world  
\- and above all the contact with other people -.  
She was sitting on her sofa as usual and ignored the calls from her partner. Since the last time He called He wanted to call him back, but not now, not today. Also she thought He would ne asleep as well.  
She knew that he was only worried, but she just could not use it, she just needed her peace. The calmness to think and to be clear about everything soon.  
-to conclude with this theme.  
But she was not expecting what was going to happen today.  
It was shortly after half past ten and usually she slept at this time already.  
-usually.  
But like she said it was nothing like before. Even her partner was no longer the same.  
She had always been grateful to him that he did not mutter or protect her. Even if she had never told him.  
She could look out for herself and decide what was right and what was wrong for her. But now, after all seemed to be over, he was as caring as ever, and she felt as if she was stifled.  
It was too much, too oppressive.  
She finished, she did not want any compassion. Everything she wanted was everything was as before.  
Or was she asking for too much ?!  
All this pain, it made her crazy, sometimes she could barely endure ed.  
-and exactly such a day was today.  
She buried the face in her hands, breathed deeply once.  
why her?  
Why not someone else?  
Where did these people take the right to do this?  
She still could not quite understand what had happened to her. But could anyone understand it at all?  
She did not know.  
She got up and went to the bathroom, thinking of going to sleep. But she would still take a hot shower. She sighed as she arrived in the bathroom.  
Much lately everything was so hard and she felt so oppressed and from time to time she could not stand the pain. Sometimes it was just too much, just like today.

Much lately everything was so hard and she felt so oppressed and from time to time she could not stand the pain.  
Sometimes it was just too much, just like today.  
Today was such a day where she just wanted to feel nothing more. No pain, no fear, no anger, no grief.  
She stood in front of the mirror and looked at herself. She saw her reddened face, the swollen eyes and the dark rings underneath.  
She could not deny it, she looked bad. You could say that all this here literally robbed her of sleep. Because if she slept at all it was no restful sleep, because she was followed by nightmares. Every night she woke up sweatfully, since she had once again misled a nightmare.  
She dismissed her thoughts and pulled the pullover over her head, under which she wore nothing. Then she stroked her pants slowly down and got out of it. She folded both things neatly and put them on the loo.  
Then she closed the door, stripped down her slip and threw it into a laundry basket.  
She turns on the water and lets it get hot for a while. Finally, she holds her hand for a hand-checking of the temperature under the water. It is hot enough and she gets under the steamy shower.  
She just stands there and lets the water run over her body. After a while she takes the shampoo and washes herself.  
The penetrant smell rises into her nose and fills the room. The water runs over her body and for a moment she is paralyzed.  
This whole pain. it was too much. Too much load she had to carry.  
It depressed her, made her life difficult.  
Tears ran down her cheeks, but they got lost in the flow of the water.  
"I can not anymore!"  
She cried desperately.  
"I just can not do it anymore."  
She hardly recognized herself again.  
What was going on with her ?! Otherwise it was not so. She had always been the strong one. Or why did everyone in the FBI called her secretly the icequeen. She had always been able to hide her weakness so far. It had always worked so far.  
But now suddenly she got nothing on the line.  
When she was about to take the bodylotion, the razor fell into her hand.  
She looked at it for a long time, thoughtfully.  
Her heart felt so immensely heavy. It felt as if someone wanted to pull it out. As if someone were standing in front of her and pulled it tightly.  
So oppressive. Without she had noticed it was the hand with the knife slipped to her upper arm.  
The blade felt cold on her skin, which had been heated by the water.  
Then she pressed. She hissed briefly because of the pain, but she liked it. She grinned.  
She saw the red thick liquid running over her arm, watching as the blood mixed with the water.  
She started another time and slowly she liked it more and more.  
She closed her eyes as the blade slipped through her skin.  
She cut one more time until she realized what she was doing.  
Scared she dropped the blade and it landed on the ground. The water around them went red from blood.  
Her hands scared in front of her mouth, she looked at the blood-colored water that gurgled in the drain.  
She switched off the shower, reached for the towel.  
Carefully she dried herself off, took care of the cuts.  
Her arm burned and she had to admit that she enjoyed it in a way.  
She tied the towel around her and dried her hair with a smaller one.  
Finally, she went to the bedroom and pulled out a wide white t-shirt that almost reached her upper arm.  
She was dressed in a comfortable gray jogging trousers.  
She would not see anyone anyway.  
She pulled up the sleeve of the shirt and looked at the cuts. They were not too deep, but they were nothing you should Ignore. She decided to leave the wounds dry. She was about to go to sleep, then the doorbell rang.  
And although she knew she would not open anyway, she was interested who had rung the bell.


	2. Chapter two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction to choose how the story should go on! I will try to update the story on here as fast as I can :))

ROSE RED

She hoped it was not her mother who has rung the bell at this late time. She would just not have any nerve to talk to her now. She walked to the door and on her way the door rings two more times. As she was standing at the door she looked through the peephole. She was suprised of who was standing there, in front of her door. Especially at this time. After all it was nearly twelve pm.   
On the other side of the door was standing her over-caring partner, Mulder. She sighed. She really don't needed any compassion.  
"Dana please open the door"  
His voice sounded tormented and full of pain.  
"please. You don't answer the calls and you're not calling back. I just want to know how you are."  
Slowly her little hand grabbed the key, she missed him, even if she wouldn't admit it and probably this was the reason why she opened the door.  
She opened the door a gap and avoided it to look into his eyes.  
"I'm fine"  
She lyed.  
He looked at her suprised, he didn't expected that she would open the door. He stood there a bit unsettled and intimidated. They were standing there a moment without saying a word. She was just about to close the door again, but he hold onto her.  
"Could i come in?"  
He asked, anxiety in his voice. She hesitated a while, thought about it, but then she stepped to the side.  
Maybe some deflection would do well. He takes it as a 'yes' and comes in. He's looking around then suddenly he walkes toward the sofa and sits down. Her apartment orderly like everytime. She was standing there silently and closed the door. She came to him, but remained in a safe distance. "i was just about to go to sleep"  
She said, still avoiding to look into his eyes.  
"do you still have a moment left for me?"  
He dared to ask. She nooded thoughtfully, came to the sofa and sat down, still keeping distance to him.  
"you want to drink something?"  
She just asked after a few minutes of silent.  
"please"  
She nooded.  
"water? Beer? Whine? Or juice?"  
He thought for a while.  
"a beer please"  
His voice sounded a bit shy.  
"sure"  
She got up and brought him a beer and herself a water.   
Then comes back to the couch and gives him the bottle.  
She smiles easily but does not look into his eyes. Then she goes back to her place and places the water on the table. He looks at her for a long time and she pretends to not notice his gaze.  
"We have to talk..."  
He suddenly says and she looks up for the first time, knowing what he's talking about.  
"really, i'm fine."  
She disputes everything.  
"i just need a little time out..."  
He noods  
"you were not on work for five weeks now."  
He just notices, his undertone worried.  
"i just need some time okay..."  
He noods again.  
"When you need to talk to somebody about anything, i'm always there for you."  
Slowly her patience is at an end.  
"I'm feeling fine! Why can't you just accept it?!"  
She hissed slightly irritated.  
"in your eyes i see something else. Or why can't you even look into my eyes?!"  
He says in the same calm tone as before.  
She did not answer anything and a few minutes of silence arise. It had not escaped him that her otherwise too narrow shape had lost weight.  
She looked even more smaller than before, and that alone made him worried enough. Finally, she bends to grab for her glass and unintentionally slips up her sleeves and shows the skin cut off by the cuts. He bends over and grabs her arm, She tried to evade him but she was too weak and could not get up against his strong grip.  
"Let me go!"  
She hissed at him, but He just stares stunned on the cuts.  
"What...?! Oh my god, Dana."  
He breathed, as she dragged in her arm.  
"you're hurting me!"  
She said.  
"No you're hurting yourself!"  
He screams horrified. Softly he sromed ober the deep cuts.  
"oh god"  
He repeated.  
"how long are you doing this?"  
He stared at her and she withdraws her arm.  
"It doesn't concern you!"  
She says indignantly and gets up but he holds her by the wrist.  
"Dana you need help!"  
She sighs and rolls her eyes.  
"I don't need help! I'm fine!"  
He looks at her skeptically.  
"I see "  
He says the irony in his voice not to overhear. She looks at him a long time and suddenly her facade is about to break.   
It made her afraid to see him so horrified. Was she really this bad?  
"Dana..."  
He said his voice sounded broken and desperate.  
"i want to help you, but you've to let me"  
Her chin began to tremble and she took a deep breath, tried to control herself again, but she did not succeed. She'd never thought she'd do this now, but she did. Sobbing  she felt into his arms and you could see on his face how much suprised he was about it. But that was exactly what he wanted and he took her in the arm, consoled her. "i can't anymore..."  
She sobbed  
"All this pain, it just gets too much."  
"Shhh"  
He tried to calm her. He could feel her trembling body on him and even if he don't wanted to know how it was for her, he knew that it wasn't easy. It hurted him to see the otherwise so strong and self-confident Dana Katherine Scully so vulnerable and broken. In a way he was afraid.  
Would she ever get over it again?  
He hoped it. He wanted the old scully back, who was so desperate to always find a scientific solution at even more obvious incidents, and kept him from doing something stupid or even saved him. "you should better go to sleep..."  
He says worried and strokes softly over her back. She nooded and leaned back to look at him. She looked at his lips. It was like she could not think.   
She always thought that he is very atractive, but she would never have said it.   
Long she looked at his lips, of course he noticed it. She gazed in a very studious way.   
He was not sure what she was doing and slowly her body leaned forward.   
Her head was near his and he could feel her breath rushing against his face.   
Did she loved him?  
She was afraid to ask herself this question and she would never dare to ask it to herself. But even if. He would never feel the same way as her. But right now in this moment it doesn't matter for her. She could not think and her head was just empty,like her heart. She wanted to feel something. Something real. Suddenly their lips met and they kissed very shy. But he knew that it was not right. Softly he presses her away from him. She looks into his eyes. Pain crawls up in her and she can hardly hide her tears. "I'm sorry"  
She sobs and runs to her room. The door closes with a loud tone.  
"Dana"  
He says, he didnt meant it like this.  
He stands up and now he stands in front of her door.  
"Dana?"  
His voice was softly and he knocked. Loud sobs came from inside the room and he knew she was crying.  
"Go away!"  
She screamed. "Dana i'm sorry"  
He sighed it broke his heart to hear how she cried.  
"Dana...?"  
She gave him no answer. "Dana i... I didn't meant it like you think"  
He hears that she gives him attention now.  
"all this..."  
He continues  
"...i know it's hard for you. But..."  
He sighed  
"you're not you"  
He heard little steps coming to the door.  
"Dana, please..."  
He still stood in front of the door.  
"please let me in"  
he saw how the door moved and made a few steps back.  
She stood there and his heart broke as he saw her. She looked bad. There was no other way to describe it. Her body looked fragile and she had lost a few kilo the last days. Altought she had dark circles under her eyes and she looked whiney. "Come here"  
He said and opened his arms.   
Slowly she made a few steps forward and waves her arms around his waist. She sobbed and her body was trembling. "I know all this is not easy, but i will be here"  
He says and gives her a kiss on the forehead. He wanted to go back to the couch but she didn't let him go.  
"Let us go back to the couch..." He says, it was not very comfortable for him because she was so little and fragile. She did not answer she just stand there and hugged him. He sighes softly and then just carries her to the couch.  
He was curious how much she trust him, she did not even shriek or look up. She just let it happen. Slowly he sits down and she does not let go of him.  
"Thank you"  
She says and he smiles bride. "nothing to thank for"  
After a while she calms down and sits up next to him. They stopped talking and she just sits there in her own thoughts. Minutes are rushing past, and he could not even think of what time it was now. "Are you alright?" His voice suddenly brings her back into reality and she shrieks a little bit. "yeah yeah i'm fine." She says still a bit in her thoughts.  
Her face became red as she noticed she had stared at his lips the whole time.  
"I'm sorry. I was in my thoughts."  
She tries to explains and he noods. 'sure' he thought but did not say it. She was not the same anymore and he feeled it. The athmosphere was diffrent, but he didn't know what was diffrent. It was just diffrent. She looks up into his eyes and smiles a bit ashamed. But altought that he knows that she was in thoughts again, he couldn't be angry. He knowed it was not easy to get all over this and the only thing he could do for her was beeing there if she needs him. They were sitting there and after a while he got lost in his own thoughts. Why did she do things like self-harm?  
That was not her. That was not Scully. She was so strong.  
How can she do something like this?!  
He asked himself.  
And then the fear came.  
What if she kills herself?   
He don't even wanted to imagine it.  
He could not live without her.  
But he couldn't take care of her the whole time. And even if, she wouldn't let him. Now he was the one who sighed but she didn't notice.  
They sat there for a long time and suddenly she said  
"I'll go to bed now. I'm tired."  
He nooded and was about to stand up to leave her apartment but she stand up in front of him and looked up into his eyes.  
"It's to late now to drive home and i know you're tired too. If you want you can sleep on the couch." She smiles a little and before she goes into the bathroom she just dared to look a few seconds at his lips. She had to admit it, he was a very handsome guy.  
He was okay with it that he could stay the night. So he was with her and could take care of her if anything was happening. He just sat down on the couch and Watched out of the window. After a while she came out of the bathroom. She came into the livingroom and searched for a blanket and a pillow. As she finally found both she came back to him  
"sit up"  
She said and he does. She placed the pillow and the blanket on the couch, then she left. At the doorframe of the door to the bedroom he turned a last time around and smiled to him.  
"good night."  
He just had sat down on the couch again.  
"good night and thank you"   
He said softly and she looked at the ground and smiled a little bit brighter what made his heart jump.  
"no problem"  
Her voice was nearly a whisper but he heard it and nooded thankfully. ...  
It was late in the night and he layed on her sofa, but could not sleep. It was because of her. Her self harm story let him no rest.   
Why did she do this?  
He was in his thoughts as he suddenly heard a low scream and a gasp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first fanfiction :)) I hope you like it! Feel free to leave a comment or criticism!


	3. Chapter three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction to choose how the story should go on! I will try to update the story on here as fast as I can :))

ROSE RED

He stood up jerkily and hurried to her bedroom without thinking.He only breathed a sigh of relief when he realized that she was still lying there undisturbed. She slept and was completely sweaty. Her body trembled and she gave a little gasp from time to time. He could see how quickly her breast basket lifted and lowered. Slowly he made a step towards her and sat down on the edge of the bed. She slept on.He could see how her body trembled, saw the glued hair on her forehead and felt the warmth that emanated from her body. Slowly, he raised a hand, for the sake of touching her, but he was afraid to touch her, afraid of her reaction. But what should happen ?! He told himself, after all she slept. He pulled himself together and took a deep breath. He has never bin so close to her. But it did well, because she has already take over his heart a long time ago.Even after this long time, not even after all the problems that had placed themselves in the way. He smoothed the blurred strings out of the strin, smiled. Then he put on his palm.She glowed formally. As he strokes his throat tenderly over her, she twitches and opens her eyes, she sits down abruptly and slips a bit away from him. She breathes heavily, her breast basket lifts and lowers quickly. Frightened and somewhat hurt, he looks at her. She closes her eyes and breathes deeply. But her body is still trembling.  
"Wh What are you d doing here?"  
She asks with a trembling voice.  
"You screamed in the dream."  
he said gently. She says nothing, tries to get the shiver under control. He watches her for a while.  
"Do you freeze?"  
He finally asks and she nods.  
"A bit"  
she breathes barely audible. he nods.  
"Come here."  
she hesitates and bends. He pulls the blanket  
"Cover yourself"  
she nods and comes closer, he makes a step back. Then she slips under the blanket.  
"Wait a minute."  
he said, swelling from her eyes. A little later, one can hear a faint 'ping' and only a moment later he stands in the door frame. In his hand a warm bottle. He comes up to her, and holds it to her, whereupon she takes and cuddles herself.  
"Thank you"  
she breathed.He smiles briefly and then leaves the room again. When he comes back, he has a fever thermometer in his hand.  
"You glow formally."  
he says explaining  
"I just want to make sure you're not sick"  
he comes closer and crouches in front of her. To his relief, she nods.  
"Can you sit down?"  
He asks gently. She nods again and sits up trembling.He smiles cheerfully.  
"Can you undress your shell?"  
She hesitates but then pulls the top over her head. Slowly her body is covered with goose bumps. She wore nothing under the shirt which she had managed and he had to swallow. Did not try to look. He called himself in memory that it was only for her well, nothing else. Gently, he put a hand on her arm. She shrank under the touch. He looked into her eyes, she returned his look.Gently, he stroked her arm, and her two breaths swelled. Slowly her head leaned in his direction and her look straightened full of desire on his lips. They were getting closer and he could feel her hot breath. It whispered softly around his contours, he could even hear it softly.  
Then their lips met, a tingling pulled through their bodies, which were after a long time finally reunited.She felt drawn to him and she knew that he loved her, but she was still too confused to suppress her feelings or to understand all this. He enjoyed this moment, but he felt the feeling that it was wrong. He wished it was really her, that she would did it in full awareness, but that was not so. And that was exactly what he knew. Slowly he released the kiss and looked deeply into her eyes, smiled. It hurt him in the heart, but it was the right thing.She approached him again, but he held her back. Took her face in both hands.  
"That's not right,"  
he says, his voice trembling. You can hear the pain in his voice.  
Her hands gently resting on his upper body and she stretched again to a kiss after him. Another time, on this evening, their lips lined up and it was about him. He could no longer control himself, he loved her too much.This time the kiss was more passionate than the first and they began to play with each others tongues and tease themselves. They formally challenged each other. Her hands ran over the body of the other and he could feel her hard nipples through their shirts. A sigh escaped from both.Cleverly she pushs her hands up his upper body and under his shirt when finally gets rid of it. Gently migrate her fingertips over his naked skin and he slowly gets a goose skin that covers his body. Now she takes off her top again and her kisses never separate for a long time. This feeling of naked skin on naked skin spurs the two only more. Finally, she throws her body aside and he pushes her back into the matrazo.His hands wandered down from her cheeks and stayed on their way to her hips hanging short on their bosom. He kneaded this and she escaped a loud sigh. Finally, with his hands, he paved the way to her hip and he took off her pants. A sigh left her mouth and showed her desire. When he had rid her of her trousers, he approached her neck and began to kiss her gently. But she sighed and stretched her neck, her eyes twisted slightly.Finally, she went to work. Her fingers went gently down his upper body and she went to pull his pants down. He helped her and got out of the pants. Barely he was standing up their lips met again and they kissed. Impulsively their lips met over and over again. Only between a sigh. With the time her kisses went down his neck to his upper body. But then he realized what he was doing.  
Gently he took her face in both hands and looked at her urgently  
"this is wrong"  
he finally brings about.  
"That's not you"  
he says pain in his voice. He takes a deep breath again and thinks she probably will not remember his words later. So he took a heart.  
"Dana"  
his voice was quiet.  
Part sixteen "I love you, and maybe you just do not know how much you hurt me right now, but this is wrong, I really love you, and will keep you from doing this mistake, because I think ...  
no, I know you Would regret it. "  
You could hear how pain in his voice resonated.  
He removed a piece from her, trying to have him back with him remained unsuccessful. He gathered together their two things and held their own.  
"Get dressed"  
he says, and begins to dress himself again.To his relief, she had obeyed his instruction, and was also dressed again. He looked at her, and she replied, but she felt as though she was not properly present. She was now sitting in her bed like a little girl in the bed of her parents, which was terrifying. He sighed and looked at her seriously.  
"you should rest."  
He says, and dares to approach her again and pushes her gently into the bed.  
"Lie down,"  
he says, gently pulling the blanket over her. She continues to follow his instructions and is now in her bed, looks at him with big eyes. He removed himself from her and left without saying a word the room.After a while he was sure she was sleeping again. He had sat on the couch the whole time, just in case she would need him. And suddenly, tired as he was, he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first fanfiction :)) I hope you like it! Feel free to leave a comment or criticism!


	4. Chapter four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction to choose how the story should go on! I will try to update the story on here as fast as I can :))

ROSE RED

The next morning  
[Day two]  
As he woke up, she was still asleep.  
He went to the bathroom and washed his face.  
He was not sure if all this was really happening. As he looked up into the mirror he notices a little bottle standing under it. It looks like some medicin and he takes it up, looks at it skeptically.  
He doesn't know what kind of medication it is and so he decides to take away a pill. As he is about to take the pill she gets into the bathroom. "Good morning"  
He saids and sneeks the one pill into his pocket.  
"Good morning"  
She replies and looks at the bottle in his hand. He notices her look and asks  
"Where is this for?"  
She looks like she's still tired and he was sure her temperature wasn't better.  
"Uhm, I got them from my doctor. It's against my nightmares and the headaches." She says honest. She knew it wouldn't get better when she would lie to him. He noods.  
"Okay"  
His voice sounded softly and he put the bottle back.  
He comes a few steps towards her  
"How are you feeling?"  
He asks carring  
"Do you want me to be honest?"  
She asks and look up to him.  
"sure"  
He just replies.  
"bad"  
Was the only thing she said  
"Oh no, wait. Worse."  
He laughes and feels with his hand her temprature.  
"you're still hot"  
He says.  
"you should better get some rest."  
She noods. "yeah, I think that's a good idea my head aches"  
She says and sighs.  
"I'll go grab some breakfast for us"  
She smiles a little.  
"Okay"  
She goes into the bathroom and grabs the medication, takes a pill out of it and swallows it.He watches her.  
"I'll be back soon"  
He says and smiles cheerfully.  
She noods and goes back to the bedroom.Then he leaves her apartment. Sure, he wanted to grab some breakfast but he also wanted to check the medication pill.He would have to send it to quantico.Thoughtfull he made his way trough the elevator. As he was downstairs the elevator made 'ping' and the doors opened in front of him. He went outside the building to his car. His thoughts were still at her, he could only hardly imagine all this.He sat into his car and started the motor. Afte a while he was where he wanted to be, he got out of his car and went in. This time he was not going to his own office, like everyday, no he was on the way to another office. He was in the way to the office of his friend Tschuck. He was good at such things and maybe he could find out something and he wouldn't have to send the pill to quantico. Tschuck had helped them in their case with the lazarus bowl. When he thought of this case he was still curious. But that was not why he was there. Suddenly he was standing in front of Tschuck's office door. He sighed and knocks.  
"Come in"  
Someone shouted from the inside.  
He opened the door. What he saw looked funny. He saw Tschuck with some electronic head or what it was on, standing in the room holding a remote control.  
"What's that Tschuck?"  
He laughed.  
"don't laugh, don't laugh"  
Tschuck said  
"they found this in the house of a crazy scientist."  
He looks at him skeptically with a big grin.  
"You're kidding me!"  
"I'm not"  
Tschuck said.  
"I'm the happy one who can test this thing and find out what it's for"  
He laughed.  
"Isn't this ironical?!"  
He noods  
"yeah, but Tschuck"  
He wanted Tschuck to look at him  
"Tschuck"  
Tschuck was pressing some buttons.  
"Tschuck!"  
Finally he looks at him.  
"I'm here because I need your help. It's important."  
He sounded very serious  
"Okay"  
Tschuck noods and puts the crazy hat down and places it onto the desk with the remote control "you look worried."  
Tschuck said, he first saw it yet in his face and then he knowed it was really something important.  
"please don't ask"  
He replies.  
"just help me"  
Tschuck noods.  
"sure. How can i help you?"  
He fishes the little pill out of his coat.  
"What's this?!"  
Tschuck asks.  
"that's what i want you to find out."  
"Okay but it will take a while. Can i call you when i got it?"  
He noods.  
"please hurry"  
"I'll do the best i can"  
Tschuck replies.  
"Thank you"  
He said and was about to leave the office.  
"Wait Mulder"  
He says.  
"I bet you see Scully more then i do, Set her good improvement from me."  
He noods and smiles a bit sadly.  
"I will"  
And before Tschuck can ask anything he had left the office.  
He made his way back to his car. A bad feeling came up in his stomach.  
A bad feeling about the pill.  
But maybe she was right. Maybe it was really just normal medication.  
He tried to believe, but he couldn't.  
All this was too curious as that this could be only a normal pill. He sighed.  
Why does all this bad things always happen to them?!  
Why couldn't they be lucky for one time?  
As he was finally in his car he drove to a bakery and got them some breakfast. He brought something to eat and coffee.  
Then he drove back to her apartment.  
He just stands in front of her apartment door now. He searches for the key and opens it. He got a few steps in and takes of his coat.  
Then he swallowed.  
Panic.  
He gasped.  
He took a deep breath.  
There was blood.  
Blood on the ground.  
Much blood.  
He followed the blood trail on the ground .  
It started in the kitchen. There was a bloody knife.  
His heart beated fast.  
Has she done something bad to herself?  
What had happened?  
"Dana?!"  
He screamed panically.  
"I'm here"  
Her voice was quiet and sounded hurt.  
He followed the sound of her voice to the bathroom and he took a deep breath.  
She sat on the lid and was bandageing her hand.  
"Hey what had happened?"  
He asks softly.  
She sighs.  
"I just wanted to make a salat, but i cut myself with the knife instead."  
She sighs again.  
"God, you freaked me out."  
She looks up to him and smiles a bit ashamed.  
"I couldn't sleep."  
He noods.  
"It's okay."  
"I'm gonna clean it up"  
He says and leaves the bathroom.  
She still sat there and looked on her bandaged hand.  
What was going on with her?  
She hadn't cutted herself by cooking in like years.  
It was like she couldn't do anything by herself because nothing worked.  
Also she has not told him one thing.  
She hadn't told him that she cutted herself because she got dizzy and everything went black for a moment. She don't wanted him to take only more care of her.  
She got up and went out of the bathroom.  
The ground was cleaned, there was no blood anymore.  
She got into the kitchen and saw him how he cleaned the knife. He was standing with his back to her and she took the moment to watch him. She wanted to go to him and hug him and say that she's afraid. That she can't do all this anymore. But she didn't do it. She just stand there and watched him. She could see his back muskles moving. She smiles. As he turns around he shrieks a bit. "I didn't hear you coming"  
He smiles kind.  
"Thank you"  
She says a bit shy.  
"Thank you for everything"  
She smiles now.  
"Don't thank for this. I'm always there for you"  
He replies but he don't dared to look into her eyes.  
He came a few steps near her and their bodys were nearly touching. She looked up to him.  
There it was again.  
This big desire in her look.  
His head came down.  
Their lips were close to each other.  
Then suddenly the phone rang.  
He moved away from her and looked a bit ashamed trough the room.  
She looks apologlizing at him, then she take the call. "Hey honey"  
She heard the voice of her mum.  
"Hey mum, i'm just very busy. Can i call you later?"  
She says totally not in the mood to talk to her mum.  
"Sure. Call me when you've time hun"  
"I'll"  
was the last thing she said before she hung up.  
She turns around and wanted to excuse.  
But he was not there anymore.  
Her heart got heavy.  
Was he gone?  
Then suddenly he steps back into the kitchen.  
"I got us some breakfast, remember?"  
She noods and smiles.  
She felt that they had to talk, but she don't dared to.  
She was afraid of ruining everything.  
She walks over into the kitchen and grabs some plates for them.  
"Do you want coffee?"  
She asks.  
"I brought some but i think it's already cold. So yeah, please."  
She noods and smiles.  
"Okay"  
She turns around and starts to make the coffee. He sits there on the table and watches her.  
Did she remember about what he said to her?  
He didn't know.  
As the coffee was ready they began to eat. Nobody said a word. After a while they were ready.  
"I have to got to work."  
He says and looks at her.  
She noods.  
"sure"  
"I'm so sorry you should've been gone to work hours ago"  
She just realizes.  
"It's okay"  
He smiles kind.  
"When Skinner is not okay with that, tell him you were here."  
She says.  
He shook his head.  
They were already at the door and he opens it.  
"I'll not" "I'm back this evening to see how you are, get some rest."  
He says and before she can say anything he was gone.  
The second time this day he left this apartment. His heart felt heavy, he don't wanted to leave her. But there was no choice. He left the apartment and drove to the fbi building.  
Soon, he was there and made his way trough all this people to his office. He just arrived and had opened the door and took off his coat, the phone rangs.  
He takes it up "Mulder"  
"Skinner here i want to see you upstairs in my office. Now."  
He sounded like he don't really had a good Day, most likely a rough one.  
He sighed and went upstairs with the elevator. He thought about what she said. She said that she want him to say that he has been by her because she knew Skinner would accept that, but he wouldn't say that. He knew that she hated it when people got to know her weakness. She always wants to be strong and he couldn't say it. So he just made his way to skinners office without any ideas what to say. Even if Skinner was angry at him, it wouldn't mind him. All that was important now was Scully. He came into the little room and skinners secretary looked at him."Agent Mulder, go in he is waiting for you"  
He noods and takes a deep breath. "wish me luck"  
He says and laughs to the secretary.  
Then he opens the door and gets in.  
Skinner looked at him while sitting at his desk.  
"Director Skinner"  
Mulder noods polite and sits down.  
Skinner said nothing he just looked at him. They both knew each other for years now and Skinner knew something was wrong.  
"You're late to work today"  
He says. "That's not something that happens often."  
Mulder noods.  
"I'm sorry it was a emergency"  
Skinner frowns  
"Can i may ask you what emergency it was?"  
He asks slightly irritated.  
"No"  
Mulder's voice is decided  
"It's something private"  
He still looks into skinners eyes.  
"I hope it was important"  
Skinner says, but he is done with the theme.  
"Did you heard anything of Agent Scully?" He asks and he thinks.  
Yeah sure he had. "I just called her and she said everything is good. But she still needs some time." Skinner nods. "Okay"  
Skinner stands up to say goodbye to Mulder.  
Mulder stands up too. "When you meet her anytime tell her good improvement from me"  
Mulder nods. "I will"  
And with these words he leaves the room. he walks down the corridor and down to his office. He wasn't fully present today he was thinking of her the whole time. Suddenly he remembers a case. The case with Judy. Judy Gerald. He searches for the case file. Judy had kinda the same story as Dana. He was sure she could help him.  
Judy has bin abducted too and she had cancer. But she was still alive and she had bad dreams all the time. Mulder knew that.

He would just visit her. It was important. The way to her house in west Virginia was not short and he would have to drive now, if he wants to be home this evening for Scully. He gets back to his car and starts his way. He already drived for an hour and was now in the middle of nowhere. He just saw trees. I mean that what he could see of them. It was raining. Raining like hell. A thunderstorm was above him and made his view bad. The street was old and rough. The worst of it was that the street got slippery. He didn't drove fast, it was too dangerous. He drove slowly through the heavy rain. Now and then a loud bang and a flash. The windshield wipers of his car worked without pause as fast as they could but the rain was too heavy for them.  
He wanted to call Scully and say that he probably will be late this evening. He looked on the other seat and grabbed his phone. but as he turns it on, there's no signal. He sighs and throws the phone back onto the other seat.  
Thoughtfull he looks through the windshield. Suddenly there are two lights of another car. It was dark outside because of the big Cloud above them. Another car in the middle of nowhere. He thought. Funny. The car was driving fast.  
Idiot.  
Mulder thought. Then everything went fast. The car was just about to drive past him as it changes his course. The car drives into him and he looses all control over the car. One tire slides over the side of the street and the car rolls down the slope next to the street. panic. What had happened. Everything turned round. He heard loud sounds of his car crashing into stones and the ground. As the car hit a big stone there was a huge jerk and his head pounded against the steering wheel. everything went black. ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first fanfiction :)) I hope you like it! Feel free to leave a comment or criticism!


	5. Chapter five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction to choose how the story should go on! I will try to update the story on here as fast as I can :))

ROSE RED

Meanwhile in Georgetown Scully has bin sleeping a bit. As she woke up it was already late. She stood up and went into the kitchen to make herself some tea. She knew Mulder would be coming the next time so she wouldn't go to bed again. The hours were rushing past but Mulder did not show up.   
He got a new case.  
She thought. He was just busy and the streets are very crowded at this time. Maybe he is late. But even after the next three hours, he hadn't shown up. He hasn't even called her. She was hurt.  
Did he really forgot her?   
She would have to find out. It was already 10 pm and she called his home but there was just the answering machine. She sighed and tryed to call his phone. She was worried as the answering machine of his phone went on too.  
Where was he?  
She decided to drive to his apartment. Maybe he was at home and forgot to turn his phone on. She sighed and went into the bedroom to dress herself with something with which she could leave the house. The whole way to Mulder's apartment she was thinking about it. Has he really forgot that he wanted to come?  
Curious and hurted she stopped her car in front of the building where he lived.   
She had to admit it, as he was there, she hadn't any bad thoughts. When he was there everything was okay, and even if not, she knew he would be there for her. And after all this now, he forgot to visit her?   
That hurts.  
She goes up, tooks the elevator and stands a few minutes later in front of his door. She didn't know if it was still a good idea now. He would've have a reason.  
Was she the reason?  
Anyways, she took a deep breath and dared to knock.   
The knock was quiet and he did not answered. She sighed and dared to knock louder. No answer. He must've heard it.  
"Mulder?"  
Her voice was trembling.   
Did he ignored her? "Mulder, it's me"  
She sobbed. With trembling hands she puts his key out of her jacket and opens the door.  
"I'm coming in now"  
She says and she knew that was a bad idea.  
But what she saw, shocked her in a way. "Mulder?"  
"Mulder!"  
She screamed, panic crawling up in her stomach.  
He wasn't there.  
She took a deep breath and forces herself to calm down.   
What should she do now?  
She got out her phone of her jacket and dealed a number. It rang a few times, then somebody tooks up.  
"skinner"   
The voice said  
"skinner, it's me, it..." She said nervously, was this really a good idea?  
"Scully?! Are you okay?"  
He asked worried.  
"i'm okay, but I don't know if mulder is"  
She said with a trembling voice  
"He is probably at home"  
Skinner said  
"No, He isnt"  
"well, mulder will be alright, you know how He is"  
She sighed and Skinner just wanted to say something as she hung up. He wasnt helping.   
Maybe she should just wait in her apartment. Slowly she went out of his apartment and closed the door, went down back to her car.  
Then she drives home.  
As she is home she just goes to sleep and tried not to think about Mulder. And suddenly she fell asleep.

Next day  
[Day three]

She woke up because her phone rang. She sighed and sit up,  
then she took the phone.  
"Scully"  
She said "Scully, here's Skinner"  
Now she was awake.  
"Did you heard anything of Mulder since yesterday afternoon?"  
He asks.  
"No"  
She said and fear came up in her.  
"What's wrong?"  
She heard Skinner sigh.  
"I can't call him and he should Come to me this morning but he wasn't there. The camera says he left the office in the afternoon yesterday."  
He said.  
"He wanted to come to me the evening but he wasn't there and he was not home, that was why I called you"  
She dared to say. If he really was missing Skinner need to know this.  
"Okay"  
Skinner says thoughtfull.  
"I'll come"  
She says.  
"No, you won't"  
Skinner says.  
"When you show up here, i'll give you a time off"  
She sighed. "I need to help find him"  
She says worried. "maybe he is just somewhere else.  
We will find him, trust me"  
Skinner says.  
"calm down"  
"Okay"  
She breathes. "I'll call you when we have anything new"  
He says.  
"Thank you"  
Was all she could say, until he hung up.  
She was full in panic.  
Her whole body trembled.   
What had happened to him?  
She tried to calm down, but she couldn't now.  
She had to do anything.   
But what?  
She couldn't show up in the Fbi.   
Then suddenly she had an idea.  
She grabbed the phone and typed a number.  
"Lone gunmen here"  
She heard Langlys voice.  
"I need your help, he's missing and i... I'm i"   
She couldn't say anything clear.  
Too much panic was crawling in her stomach.  
"Take a deep breath"  
He said "And then start again. Calm down."  
She took a deep breath.  
"Here's Scully, Mulder he's missing. I need your help to find him."  
Her voice was still trembling. .  
"Okay"  
Langly said.  
"Calm down and come here."  
She noods  
"Thanks, i'll come"  
Then she hung up.  
She dressed herself acceptable and grabbed her gun, then she made her way to the Lone gunmen office. ...  
She came as fast as she could and now she stood 35mins later in the Lone gunmen's office.  
"What do you guys found out?"  
She asks and tries to hide her trembling hands.  
Langly looked up from his computer. "His phone was last located in east Virginia."  
She looks confused.  
"What should he do in Virginia?!" "we dont know but a camera filmed him while driving over the border"  
Frohike turns a computer and shows her the video tape.  
She comes a few steps towards to take a better look. It was definetly Mulder.  
"i don't understand this"  
"we neither do"  
Byers replies. "but after a few miles we lost his signal because of a thunderstorm. There was no service." She was worried. What had happened?! Was he hurt?   
What does he wanted in Virginia?   
She sighed. Maybe it was the best to tell Skinner all this. He could do something.  
"excuse me"  
She says and leaves the room for awhile. With a deep sigh she grabbed her phone out of her jacket.  
Her still trembling hands tipped skinners number. "Assistand Director Skinner"  
She heard his voice.  
"Skinner it's me"  
She said.  
"Agent Scully, I said *you* will do *nothing*"  
He stressed the words you and nothing. "And what do you say when i would say i got something?!"  
She is slightly irritated.   
He sighed.  
"tell me, but you have to promise, you will go home and wait."  
"He was filmed by driving over the border in Virginia. We lost his phone signal in east Virginia."  
She said.  
"there was a big thunderstorm." She didn't said yes that she would just wait.  
"Thanks Agent Scully."  
He says.  
"Now let us do our work"  
Skinner ends the call.  
She buried her face in her hands and took a deep breath.   
What would she do if he is hurt?  
She dont wanted to imagine it.  
She comes back into the office.  
"Thanks guys."  
She smiles slightly.  
"but i got to go, call me when you can find out something new."  
She says.  
Langly noods.  
"sure"  
She turns around and leaves the office. She goes into her car and drives home.  
Hopefully Skinner would find him.  
Back at home she was sitting on her couch again, but she was nearly dying inside. All these memorys with him. She couldn't just switched off her mind. That was her and so is she. But all these memorys hurted. When she closed her eyes it felt like she was still in his arms. His strong arms around her, his hands stroking over her back, his rough but soft voice trying to calm her down, his heartbeat under her hand on his breast, his basket lifting up and down by his breath, his breath in her hair, his soft lips on her forehead. All this. It hurted.  
The memorys were real and she wanted to stay in them, but everytime she started to believe that it was real she opened her eyes and it was not. He was not there.   
She couldn't stand all this, she was nearly crying.  
So she made the desicion to search him. She went back to her car, got in and drove straight to Virginia. He thoughs were killing her but she tryed not to think. After a very long while, quite too long for her she arrived at the border. She made her way trough it and droved the way Mulder had driven too. It was very lonely out here. Just she, the street and the forest. No other car was there and even after a few miles she hadn't passed anyone. Suddenly she heard sirens behind her and an emergency and an emergency doctor rushed past her. Where were they driving too? Here was no one living, not in a radius of ten miles. She was curious and suddenly fear crawled up in her stomach.   
Mulder!  
She she stepped onto the accelerator and rushed after the two medical cars. After a few mins she stopped the car in front of some other cars and people of the fbi standing around. She got out of the car and saw Skinner. She ran to him.  
"Where is he?!"  
She screamed panically. "Where is he!!!"  
Skinner helt her. "Agent Scully calm down."  
"how could i calm down?!" She screamed. "Where is he?!"  
Panic in her eyes. She saw in skinners eyes that something really terrible had happened.  
"What happened?" Her voice was just a whisper.  
Skinner dont dared to look into her eyes.  
"He had a car accident. Somebody pulled him off the road down this slope. I dont think anyone could survive anything like this."  
Suddenly she heard the rolling rolls of the stretcher. On it she saw him.  
"oh my god"  
She ran to him. The medicals wanted to push her away.  
"Miss please..."  
"I'm a medical doctor!"  
She screamed. "how bad is he hurt?"  
She didnt looked up from him. Softly she stroked his hair.  
"He is unconscious"  
The medical said.  
A tear runned down her cheek.  
"Mulder?"  
She asked softly. No reaction.  
Suddenly she saw all the blood. She swallows. She felt dizzy, but she wouldn't leave him alone, she would stay by his side. "Why is there so much blood?"  
She asked full of fear, afraid of the answer. "He got bad injuries." She nooded  
"Miss if you want you can drive with us"  
"Miss if you want you can drive with us"  
She noods again.All happens so fast. He gets into the car and she sits next to him, holding his hand.His hand was cold, lifeless.Her hands trembled and she knew that this wasn't good.The ambulance rushed fast trough the streets and just a few minutes later they arrived at the hospital. Mulder was brought into the imtensive care unit and the doctors were already waiting. Suddenly someone grabbed her.  
"Miss?"  
But she was not really present.  
"Miss!"  
Suddenly the voice brings her back into reality.  
"You have to stay here you cant go into the op."  
A nurse says.  
"I'm a doctor!"  
She says in panic to leave him alone.  
"Then you know they will do their work well, you cant help and not in this condition"  
Her whole body was trembling.  
"Come here and calm down."  
She brought her into the waiting room.  
"if you want anything, ask for nurse callie"  
She noods.   
Slowly she goes to a seat.   
She covers her face in her hands and took a deep breath.  
What would she do without him?  
Suddenly Skinner came in.  
"how is he?"  
He asked.  
She just looked at him, tears in her eyes.  
"still in the op"  
She just said, trying to suppress her tears.  
She took a deep breath  
He will made it.   
She thought.  
He had to made it.  
"tell me if there's something new."  
He says and leaves the room after she noods.  
She sat there and the time raced past her. Hours after hours went past and she didn't know how long he's been in the op now. She hadn't slept the whole time. She couldn't. Then she heard the steps of the nurse.  
"Dr.Scully?"  
She asked and she stood up abruptly. "Yes"  
She looked a long while at her.  
"He will be out of the op in a hour."  
She nods.  
"Thank you. Any news?"  
The nurse shook her head.  
"No, the doctors are still in"   
Then she leaves her again.  
She sat there and remembered she had to call Skinner.  
She took her phone out and called him.  
"Skinner, it's me"  
Her voice was full of pain  
"Agent Scully"  
She took a deep breath.  
"He will be out of the op in an hour"  
She heard Skinner sigh.  
"I will be there"  
He said and the phone call ended.  
She put away her mobile phone and buried her face into her hands.  
What the hell had happened?  
Was all this real?  
Or was it just a bad dream?  
1 hour later  
Skinner just came into the hospital and a nurse came to him. "Mr.Skinner he is out of the op now. If you want you can see him now."  
The nurse says.  
"how is he?"  
He asked.  
"still in the coma. He is very critical. When he wokes up the next three days he will made it."  
Skinner nods.  
"Did you tell Agent Scully?"  
He asked.  
"No i wanted to tell her but i first met you on my way to her"  
She said.  
"Okay, please dont tell her."  
"...but mister!"  
The nurse wanted to protest, she knew how long she had waited for him and how many tears she had cried.  
"I will tell her"  
He said trying to explain it.  
The nurse nods and dont asks more.  
Skinner was alone again and went the way to Mulder's room.  
He took a deep breath before he entered the room.  
...  
Scully sat there and even after an hour and a half the nurse hasn't said he is out of the op. Suddenly she stood up and asked.  
"Mister Mulder is in room 237, Director Skinner said he will tell you."  
Was all the nurse said.  
"Skinner hadn't told me but why?"  
She ran to Mulders room and saw Skinner in front of it, talking to a doctor.  
"Why haven't you told me?!"  
She screamed confused. "how is he?"  
Skinner just saw her and came a few steps near.  
"Agent Scully, calm down."  
"I want to see him!"  
She shouted and started crying.  
"please stay here, I dont think it would be a good idea"  
She looked at him angry  
"how could i?! he is my partner and he would do the same for me!"  
She said.  
Skinner wanted to stop her but she already was at the door.  
He sighed.  
"Dana, he is still in coma, don't expect to much."  
Skinner turns around and starts talking with the doctor again who had stood there the whole time.   
Scully's hand cupped trembling the doorknob .  
Slowly she pressed it down and opens the door. She makes a few steps in and closes the door behind her.   
Now she looks at him. At his lifeless body lying on the bed.  
She gasped. In her ear the constant beeping of the ventilator. He layed there, connected to all these life-sustaining measures. She swallowed. Her throat dried up and a thick painful dumpling formed itself. Her heart got heavy and suddenly she felt dizzy.  
She felt how her legs break, but she couldn't grab anything to stop her fall. Then everything went black. ...  
Skinner was standing outside of the room, talking to the doctor about Mulder as he heard a dull bang.  
He turned around and opened the door as he saw Scully lying on the ground.  
He screamed for a doctor and just a few seconds later two doctors were there.  
And she got stretchered her into her own room a few corridors further  
Skinner had followed the doctors  
"What's wrong with her?" He asked the doctor as he came out of her room.  
"She is fine. She is in shock and just got unconscious."  
Skinner noods.  
"Thank you"  
Skinner sighed and leaned against a wall.  
Both of his Agents were hurt. One just for now and the other. He shook his head. He didnt know if he would be his Agent again.   
What the hell was just going on?


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction to choose how the story should go on! I will try to update the story on here as fast as I can :))

ROSE RED

Scully lay in the bed in which the doctors had layed her. Slowly she woke up and starts to realize the constant noise of the hospital equipment.   
What had happened?  
Then she started to remember everything.   
Mulder!  
Suddenly she opened her eyes and sat abruptly up.  
She had to find him, She stands up and runs out of her room, bumbs into a doctor. "where is mulder?" She asks confused  
"i need to see him"  
The doctor is just as confused as she is.  
"calm down"  
He says, but she did not want to.  
"i need to see him"  
She says out of breath, shaking.  
"who is 'Mulder'" The doctor asks.  
"He is my partner, we're from the fbi"  
She says still full of fear. The doctor noods.  
"calm down and i will take you to his room"  
The doctor says, looking at her.  
She noods  
"okay"  
She takes a deep breath.  
The doctor lays one hand on her shoulder and takes her to Mulders room. He stops in front of the door.  
"here is it"  
She noods and smiles thankfully.  
"how is he?"  
She asks, her voice quiet with fear.  
"his condition has not changed, he is still in coma"  
She grabs the doorknop with trembling hands and slowly opens the door. She wals in and sees him lying there, without any reaction or moving. She closes the door and goes over the him. He just looks like he would sleep. She sits down on the chair next to him. Shly she looks at him. Her heart felt heavy. To see him lying there like this, a tear escaped her eye and runned down her cheek. She grabbed softly his hand. It was cold and liveless. Her hands were trembling. She leaned over and placed one of her hands on his cheek. Stroking softly over It. A tear dropped from her face onto his. No reaction. She started sobbing and collapsed onto his chest. He felt so cold, so liveless.   
Tear over tears were running down her cheeks, rolling onto his chest, wettening his clothes. She layed like this for hours crying, until She fell asleep. ... Suddenly The door opened and director skinner entered The room.  
He stopped as He saw her, lying on his chest. A little smile glanced over his face. A smile of sadness, but also hope. He cleared his throat. "Agent"  
Scully woke up and swiped away her tears with the sleeve of her shirt. "sir?"  
She tried to sound serious and to hide that She was crying.  
"Agent Scully, good to see you again, even..."  
He sighed "..even because of this... Unexpected reason."  
"i dont understand all this"   
She says with a trembling voice.  
Skinner stands there, watching her carefully.  
"the investigation results of the accident site look like it wasnt an accident. Somebody drove into him, pushing him off the road."  
He says.  
She cant hold it all back and tears are running down her cheeks. "why would somebody do that? We weren't in a investigation"  
She sobbed, still holding his hand. She looked at his peaceful face. It Was full of bruisings and abrasions. She did not want to admit it, but He looked bad. Really bad. Skinner did not know what to do. She sat there, his always so strong Agent, crying. "Agent Scully, do you want to stay here or do you want to help with the investigation?"  
She takes a deep breath and wipes her tears away, then She looks up to Skinner.  
"i'm gonna stay here"  
She says, her voice still trembling a bit, but She gave her best to make it sound serious. He nods.  
"okay, call me when He wakes up"  
Now She is the one who nods and She watches Skinner leave. She looks back to Mulder and sighs.  
...  
01:33 am   
Washington Memorial Hospital

Scully sat on the chair next to Mulder. She fell asleep, tired of all the crying. The beeping of the machine dozed her off to sleep. Her head layed on her shoulder, she looked relaxed, even thought it wasnt a quite comforting position. She slept like this for a couple of hours now and her body would properly ache when She wakes up. Her hand was still holding his, to notice when he wakes up. She did not wanted to let go of him.   
Suddenly his hand moved a bit and she woke up in just a matter of seconds. She leaned forward and looked at him.  
"Mulder?"  
She said softly, her voice trembling, again tears started to run down her cheeks. He was lying there without any reaction. She layed one hand on his cheek. "Mulder?" She asked again, another tear running down, dropping onto his face. Suddenly She felt his hand moving again.  
"Mulder, i'm here, open your eyes, everything is gonna be alright." She said softly, stroking his cheek.  
She saw that he slowly came back to awareness. "I'm here, i need you, you have to win this first Mulder, what can i do without you?!" She sobbed. But he was weak. Too weak. She saw that his closed eyes were moving. But then he just lay there like before. Without any move or reaction. She sobbed and layed her head on his chest. She cryed another hour till She got lulled to sleep by his heartbeat.


	7. Chapter seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my instagram @thexfilesfanfiction to choose how the story should go on! I will try to update the story on here as fast as I can :))

ROSE RED

The next morning  
[day 4]

Scully woke up early because her whole body was in ache. She had sleeped on his chest and that was not a quite comforting position.  
She stood up and stretched. A bit of her tension fell of and she let out a sigh of relief. She looked down to Mulder and all the tension that just fell off came back in one hard hit. She took a deep breath. He wont wake up again. Was all She could think right now. But she was afraid of that. She could not live without him. She just cant. She walked back to Mulder and gave him a kiss on the forehead. "I'm here"  
Her voice was just a whisper. Then she turned around and got into the bathroom.  
She closed the door behind herself and looked into the mirrow. She looked bad.  
Her whole face was swollen and red of all the crying.  
Why was all this happening?! It felt so surreal, it all happened so fast.  
Her feelings were... uncontrollable and going crazy.  
She cried... Infront of Skinner!  
What was happening with her?  
She turned on the water and washed her face. The water was cold, but it brought her back to reality.  
She was still standing in the bathroom, the constant beeping of the machine calmed her. Than she knew that he was still alive.  
She heard that somebody entered the room, properly a nurse who wanted to check up on Mulder.  
As she came into the room, a minute later, her heart dropped. The nurse injected Mulder something.  
"Stop!"  
She screamed  
"What is that? What are you injecting him?"  
The nurse ended The progress and ran away. Scully ran to Mulder. Suddenly there was a high tone in her ear. It was loud. The machine who represented his heartbeat stopped to beep. Now it was just one loud noise. She screamed panically  
"I need help! Doctor!"  
She started to resuscitate him. Then a few nurses and a doctor came, pushed her aside and started to do their work. She was out of control. And ran back to his bed, not thinking about the doctors doing their work. "mulder?!"  
She screamed a tear running down her cheek, her hand was stroking over his cheek.  
"mulder, don't leave me. I need you."  
But then the doctor screamed  
"Security! Bring her outta here!"  
Two men came and took her, she was to weak to escape but she tried her best to get rid of them, grabbing her rude. She screamed.  
"No! Let me go!"  
But they didn't. They took her out of the room. She was standing a few meters away from Mulders room. A nurse came and tried to calm her a bit. "Miss, you need to calm down. The doctors are trying to rescue him. And if you keep on protesting like that they maybe won't let you see him again." Those last words stopped her. Suddenly she felt weak, her heart got heavy and she started to sob.  
The nurse looked at her. "oh, stop crying. He will be alright again. I'm sure." She gave scully a cheering smile.  
Scully took a deep breath and closed her eyes.  
'Everything will be alright again'  
She repeated in her head, trying to calm herself.  
After she calmed a bit, she remembered the nurse injecting Mulder something. She stood up an searched for the nurse, she found her after a few minutes.  
"Nurse..." She looked at her name sign "Nurse Callie"  
This was the nurse who comforted her as Mulder was brought here.  
The nurse turned around  
"yes? Miss Mulder? Is everything alright?"  
She had properly thought that she was his wife, but that wasn't important now.  
"I saw a nurse injecting him something before..."  
Her voice breaks.  
"before his heart stopped."  
She took a deep breath and had to suppress the tears.  
Callie looked worried at her. "Would you feel better if I tell the doctors?"  
She asked  
"yes, thank you"  
Callie smiled and walked away. Scully went back to Mulders room, but his door was open and nobody was there. The panic came back and she started searching for him but nobody could tell her where he was.  
Sobbing she left into the little church of the hospital. She knelt down in front of the little altar with a golden cross. She looked up to the cross, praying that Mulder would be alright again. She was afraid, afraid of his dead.  
After she calmed a bit, she remembered the nurse injecting Mulder something. She stood up an searched for the nurse, she found her after a few minutes.  
"Nurse..." She looked at her name sign "Nurse Callie"  
This was the nurse who comforted her as Mulder was brought here.  
The nurse turned around  
"yes? Miss Mulder? Is everything alright?"  
She had properly thought that she was his wife, but that wasn't important now.  
"I saw a nurse injecting him something before..."  
Her voice breaks.  
"before his heart stopped."  
She took a deep breath and had to suppress the tears.  
Callie looked worried at her. "Would you feel better if I tell the doctors?"  
She asked  
"yes, thank you"  
Callie smiled and walked away. Scully went back to Mulders room, but his door was open and nobody was there.  
The panic came back and she started searching for him but nobody could tell her where he was.  
Sobbing she left into the little church of the hospital. She knelt down in front of the little altar with a golden cross. She looked up to the cross, praying that Mulder would be alright again. She was afraid, afraid of his dead.  
She got up and went back onto the floor. Thinking of how to find Mulder she walked automatically back to his room. She heard someone inside. As she entered the room she saw a nurse putting away the machines. Her heart dropped. Was he dead? She drew in a sharp breath. The nurse heard the noice and turned around. "are you Mrs. Mulder?"  
She asked carefully.  
Scully stood there, still shocked. "Miss?"  
"uhm, yes I... I am..."  
The nurse came to her to comfort her.  
"We brought Mr.Mulder into a different room after the operation. He is still in a very bad condition."  
Scully took a big reliefing breath. "can you show me the room?" She asked polite. The nurse nodded and they went through the corridors of the hospital till they were in front of a room. The door was closed. Scully looked over to the nurse "is that...?"  
"yes"  
She took deep breath and went inside. There he was. Unconscious. She took his hand. "Mulder..."  
She looked at him, hoping that he would just open his eyes and smile at her, cracking one of his jokes. But she knew that wouldn't happen. She sat down in the chair next to him and saw a letter on the nightstand. Why would there be a letter?  
Carefully she took the letter and opened him. "dear dana"  
It was addressed to her. The handwriting was bad. But she could read it. She started to read again  
"dear dana,  
I know how much you care about the life of your partner. I have something, a antidote. If you want to have it, meet me at 9pm at the highburn street. Be punctual. Come alone, or the antidote will never be yours. No ambush. Come upstairs into the building 9b. Floor number 3, room 231."  
Her hands were trembling. She needed that antidote. Or he would die. She knew it. She cuddled herself on his chest.  
"mulder?"  
She whispered.  
"what am I supposed to do?"  
She tried to suppress her tears.  
"oh mulder..."  
...  
Suddenly she heard a doctor outside. She turned around and saw him standing in the doorway. "is everything alright?" She asked and looked at him.  
"he will die"  
The doctor said.  
She thought she didn't heart him right.  
"excuse me, what?"  
"he will die"  
The doctor said in an aggressive voice and came a few steps near her. A nurse came up behind him.  
"he will die"  
She said. More and more nurses and doctors entered the room, all saying "he will die" over and over again.  
"he will die", "he will die"  
"No!"  
She said panically.  
All the people were coming more near and near, they walked towards mulder.  
"he will die! He will die!"  
She got onto the bed trying to defend him. "No!"  
She screamed again.  
The doctors and nurses were nearly squashing them.  
She collapsed on the bed.  
"no! No..."  
She said weakly.  
...  
And then she woke up.  
Sweaty and on his bed, hugging him. She looked around. Nobody was here. It was a bad dream. She must have fell onto sleep. And now... She was on his bed, cuddled onto him. She couldn't suppress a sad smile. She looked at the clock. Half past nine pm.  
"shit"  
She said, got up and went out of the room. Behind the doorway she stopped, turned around and went back to him. She stroked over his cheek and gave him a kiss on the forehead. "everything will be alright again"  
She said softly. Then she went outside.  
On her way she remembered leaving her car at the accident location.  
She called a taxi.  
Standing outside waiting for the taxi to arrive she thought about what she was about to do.  
Should she really go there?  
The taxi arrived and she had no choice but save him. She needed him. The taxi slowed down and stopped in front of her, after she winked at it. She opened the backdoor and got in. "where are we heading to?"  
The the taxi man asked, he was pretty young, about 23 with blonde hair. "highburn Street 9b"  
She said, still a bit lost in thoughts.  
The taxi started its way.  
"a pretty lonely area"  
The man said  
"i'm Dylan, and you are..."  
He shortly looked over his seat to her. She was looking out of the window.  
As she noticed that he had said something to her she looked to him.  
"uh..."  
It took her a moment to get his question together. "I'm dana'"  
Then she looked away again, out of the window.  
"what is such a pretty lady doing in this bad area?"  
He asked.  
Scully catches his gaze through the car mirror. "none of your buisness"  
She says cold, but with pain.  
"I guess bad times huh"  
Dylan says.  
Than there was silence.  
After a few minutes they arrived.  
Scully pays and gets out, the door is still open as Dylan says something.  
"the area here is pretty bad, if you need a drive back, no matter what time, call me"  
He hands her a number.  
She nods and takes the number, then leaves.The street is dark, there are no streetlights, unless broken ones.She walks along and searches for house number 9b.As a pigeon flies up, she shrieks. Far, in the distance a dog is Barking.  
Finally, she spots number nine. The house looks better than the other ones around. She walks up to the door and opens it. It's really dark inside and careful she makes one step inside. Suddenly everything happens fast.  
There are two people grabbing her and pulling her a bag over the head. She screams. A third man comes and removes her gun from its holster. She knew it because she heard the clicking of it.  
"bring her up."  
A voice says and the two men holding her are pushing her forwards.She stumbles up the stairs which appear in front of her, still seeing nothing.  
They enter into a room and push her in.She stumbles forwards nearly falling onto the ground. The last thing she hears is how the door closes and than everything is silent. A voice breaks the silent and anger comes up in her. She would recognise this voice all over again. She pulls off the bag and looks directly into his eyes. She comes up to him with a threatening voice. He just chuckles.  
"Agent Scully. Dana. I'm not gonna give you the antidote just like that."  
She looks at him, her eyes in a dark and full of hate. "what do you want?"  
Her voice is cold, like her eyes.He chuckles again.  
"I think you know what I want"  
She is still standing in the middle of the room. The light is weak, slightly flickering. Trying to get to know her surrounding, she looks around. The walls are dark. There is a dresser and the bed. He sits on it. Disgust fills her stomach. He stands up, slowly walking to her. "and if you don't give me what I want, you won't get what you want."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this story is finally updated! If you like you can now vote on my Instagram account @thexfilesfanfiction how the story should go on. I'm posting there every Friday!  
> Thanks for reading!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everybody who is still waiting for updates!! I didn’t forget it , I just need to find the time to write!

!!This chapter is rated PG-17!!

ROSE RED  
[day 4]

He stands up and makes a few steps to her, till he stands in front of her.  
Her small figure looks up to him.  
"what... What do you want me to do?"  
Her words are like a silent insecure whisper. Insecure if she made the right decision. Her body began to tremble and a cold shiver ran down her spine.  
His grins just gets wider, softly he lays his hand onto her cheek.  
She closes her eyes, a silent tear rolling down. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes again. The smell of smoke and cigarettes made her feel like she could throw up anytime. He made a step forward to get nearer. Another one. She steps back a few times, now feeling the bed at her legs behind her. He comes back to her and presses her down on the bed. Her big eyes look up to him, some tears streaming down. But she had to do it. She needed the antidote.  
There was no choice. He sat down next to her and started to open his shirt. She just sat there, staring, afraid.  
Then he softly took her shirt and opened it, threw it away.  
"We won't need that"  
He chuckled whilst opening her bra.  
"and that neither."  
She now sobbed. As soon as her bra was away she held her arms in front of her breasts, to cover them. He looked at her.  
"tz tz tz. Do you want the antidote?"  
She nodded, another tear streaming down her face.  
"than give me what I want"  
He took one of her hands and pulled it slowly down. She felt exposed.  
Pressing her down onto the mattress, his hands made their way to her jeans and popped the button. Pulling them down he looked up at her with pure ecstasy, leaving her pink undies on. On his way back up he stopped at her stomach, placing soft kisses on it. Her stomach was moving from her uncontrollable sobbings. He than came back up and took her breasts in his hands. She tried to just lock herself somewhere inside of her body - to not feel anything. It lasted what felt like an eternity. His hands on her breasts.  
But than they heard two shots, in front of the door and shortly after the door was slammed down. Men with guns came in. Her eyes were so full of tears that she couldn't even read the inscription on their wests.  
They grabbed and pulled him to the ground, away from her. They gave her a blanket to cover up. Than she heard a soft voice. Was it Mulder?  
It wasn't. Skinner was leaning over her.  
"Agent Scully? Are you okay?"  
She just nodded. His eyes showed his disgust for what the cigarette smoking man had done to her.  
He pulled her up, with the blanket around her, wanting to get her the hell out of here. But she resisted.  
Slowly she made a few steps toward the csm.  
"where is the antidote?"  
Her voice was shivering but confident.  
"where is it?!"  
She now nearly screamed.  
He chuckled.  
"Dana my dear"  
She slapped him.  
"it's in the dresser, first drawer"  
Walking over to the dresser she took the drawer knob with shaky hands and pulled it open. In it was a small black box. She took it and looked inside. There it was. A little bottle with a brownish looking liquid. Skinner came back to her and looked at the box and the bottle.  
"What is this?"  
She closed the box and held it steady in her hands.  
"what I wanted to get."  
She says.  
"Mulder needs it"  
Skinner nodded.  
"you should go home now."  
Scully shook her head.  
"Bring me to the hospital."  
She took her clothes and changed quickly in the bathroom. Skinner was waiting for her, standing in the hallway. As she came to him, he mustered her with eyes full of concern.  
"you sure that you don't want to see a psychiatric?"  
She nodded.  
"yes"  
Her voice was strong, steady.  
She walked down the hallway, he followed her.  
Shortly after they arrived at the hospital. She hadn't let go of the little bottle since she got it into her hands.  
They got out of the car and walked straight to the entrance. Her heart felt heavy. It was a weird feeling to have Mulders life in her hands. Would this cure him? What if it didn't? She shook her head. It just had to. Their Stepps were echoing in her head, no other sound around them.  
Clack clack clack  
Then she stood in front of his door. Suddenly everything was silent. The silence felt unbearable. The only light noice from the beeping of the machine is getting trough the door. Her hand grabs the door knob. The metal feels cold in her warm and shaky hands. In the other hand she has the antidote, holding it like it was her heart. She completely forgot about Skinner.  
"Agent Scully?"  
He asks from behind.  
"you okay?"  
She nods. Once again.  
Than she turns the knob and opens the door.  
It overwhelms her everytime to see him laying like that there. So... Lifeless. He imagined him being there now. He would perhaps make some bad joke. She chuckled, sadly. In front of the bed stood a chair and she sat down, taking his hand.  
"everything will be alright again"  
She whispered and gave him a kiss on the forehead. Now, she stood up again, got herself a syringe. She pulled it into the antidote-bottle, then into the tube from the infusion. The brownish liquid tiled through the tube into his veins. She lay the syringe on the nightstand and took his hand again. Her shaking fingers anchored with his. For her it felt like time had stopped. The world around her was on pause. The only thing that proved different was the liquid tiling into his body. She shrieked as his heartbeat got faster, like the beeping from the life-support-machine showed audibly. It got faster and faster and faster. His body began to tremble. Hard. She couldn't do anything. She was standing there -- in shock.  
Skinner screamed  
"He is having a seizure!!"  
As he started to ran for a doctor.  
He was still holding on to his hand, which shaked uncontrollable.  
Then the beeping stopped. And so did the seizure. Everything was silent. No noise. Just... Silence. A scream cut through the air.  
"Noooo!!"  
Scully lay on his torso, crying.  
"Please, don't leave me... I...."  
She sobbed.  
His body felt cold and.... Different. But the thing that hurt most was the missing of his heartbeat. The tears streaming down her face were wetting the fabric of the blanked. 

To be continued...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first fanfiction! Feel free to leave a comment or criticism!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction :)) I hope you like it! Feel free to leave a comment or criticism!


End file.
